Rough week for me

This has been a rough week for me. It's not the activities or chores or anything that's going on. I'm just having a rough time reacting and planning. I'm out of whack this week. Well, Monday was great. It started Monday night with a cruddy swim. Since then, I just can't get my head on straight. The usual tricks aren't working: coffee, reading, a little tv time, computer, a walk, a bike ride, a long shower. I need a Reset button.

Sleep issues resolved

It wasn't anything we did or didn't do. Jamey just started sleeping again. He naps about 3 hours in the morning. Another 90 minutes in the afternoon. And about 9 hours at night.

If it was developmental, he's getting up on his hands and knees quite a bit. He can scoot on his tummy all over the place.

Whatever it was, I'm glad we're passed it. I love sleep.

Quiet mornings

I love slow days. We woke up and cuddled in bed a while. Read some books and rocked while Jamey practices hands and knees. Ate some eggs and toast. Jamey loved his couple bites. I got to talk to my sister for 45 whole uninterrupted minutes while Jamey naps and Ivy watched a movie. Now she's washing the dishes. He's still napping. I'm having my third cup of coffee. Maybe a run this afternoon. It's peaceful here today.

Half days

Wouldn't it be great if Jeremy could work half days all the time?

Am I cut out for this?

The last month has been really hard. Enough to make me wonder if I'm cut out to be a mom. Waking up three or four times a night with both kids kills me. I don't get enough sleep and there's no chance to rest during the day. I'm tired physically and emotionally. I want to get away, and I feel like a bad mom for thinking that way.

I have pretty memories of life before kids and wish we could go back.

I miss going out. I miss going for evening walks. I miss sleeping in. And scrap booking. I miss having time to work out. I'm too tired and worn out to care if I eat right.

I feel mopey and full of self-pity tonight.

I asked for more info on a tech writing contract. Maybe I need to get out of the house for a while. To preserve my sanity.

A mini vacation

I am leaving tomorrow with the kids to spend the rest of the week at my parents' house. It's great to go up there anytime but especially when I'm on the verge of crazy. Ivy adores the kids, and my mom dotes on both the babies. I'll get to walk alone, maybe get my hair done, have lunch with a friend, and just plain have lots of help for days.

There are days I wish we lived down the street from my mom. We've looked at houses up there, but there's no work for Jeremy. If we ever have a million dollars, maybe we'll buy something up there so it's easier to stay longer or more frequently. Although maybe their remodeling project will add a Solt Suite.

I'd really like a vacation--a cruise--with the kids (and a nanny) but I think that has to wait until we start printing our own money.

Rest? Who needs it?

Here it is "midnight 30" and I'm up with Jamey who still isn't sleeping that well.

We thought it was teething and gave him motrin.
We thought he was hungry and gave him cereal and fruit.
We thought he needed more milk and I nursed more often.
We thought the food was giving him gut rot and we quit the food and I nursed even more.
We thought it was habit and let him cry.

No matter what we do or try, this boy wakes up every three hours. I'm going crazy and am getting a bit weary.