Friday, April 20, 2012

Hidden effects of birth control?

I read this the other day and want to THANKFULLY say I've never experienced any of these comments or attitudes. It's talking about the "hidden effects of birth control." 

    Young couples are thought irresponsible when they get pregnant right away.
    Seriously? I don't know anyone who thinks that. Or has said it out loud. And I know a lot of people. Opinionated people. I know people who wait 2 years, 5 years, 10 years. Huh, I don't know if I know anyone who got pregnant right away. People thought we were raring to go, but we waited a year. And it's a good thing, too. We fought like cats and dogs and had a lot of adjusting to do. I can't imagine being pregnant and prepping for a baby on top of that. 
    Was it planned?" is no longer deemed a rude and quite personal question, but in fact, is seen as a natural question.
    Again, I don't think I've ever heard anyone say this. To me or anyone else. 
    Children are often seen, and even referred to, as an "accident."
    I have heard this. And I don't think it's necessarily negative. Maybe a less emotionally charged word is "surprise." But it means the same--we weren't expecting this. Surprise is usually positive, and no one ever wants an accident. 
    Large families are often seen as incredible (and thus, put on an undeserved pedestal) or insane (and thus, sneered at behind their backs).
    How large is large? 20 kids seems unreasonable and probably irresponsible. Coming from a large family of 7, I scoff at 10. Double digits seems ridiculous. But that's my opinion. If some couple wants to have 100 kids AND can provide for them, why would I care? 
    Anyone who has clearly NOT bought into the birth control culture at any point is seen as fair game for jokes, criticism, or invasive questions, because (it is assumed) they "chose" something different.
    This woman must have a lot of negative experiences and crappy friends. Again, I know A LOT of women who have never used "birth control" and are not made fun of at all. This lady is jaded. 
    By extension, because they "chose" their family size, the larger-than-average family is often expected to never lack, to never struggle with discipline, to never be tired, etc. even by Brothers and Sisters in Christ.
    She needs to get off her soap box. She's just having a bad day. 
    A young professional women is "throwing her career away" if she opts to stay home with her new baby.
    Really? I threw my career away and I've never had any negative remarks about it. I have had some other moms say things like "I couldn't do it" or "How can you do it" but I don't think of them as negative. Just like I say "I couldn't get my kids & me out of the house by 7 every morning" or "Do everything I do AND work, no way." 
    Couples are often shocked and dismayed when they struggle with infertility.
      To put it bluntly, this woman is a pious bitch. Couples are shocked and dismayed about fertility because it's supposed to work for everyone. Whether you use birth control or not. People were all designed to make babies. It has nothing to do with controlling when you make them.  
      I wonder if this author has a problem with Natural Family Planning? Is her problem just with the pill or other hormonal contraceptives? Condoms? Paraguard? 

      No comments:

      Post a Comment